Driving Miss Crazy…
In all my years of operating a motor vehicle I’ve been ticketed but once and in my defense, I was young and stupid. Now that I’m old and oh so much wiser I find it incredibly beneficial to simply obey the rules of the road hence saving me tons of cashola on fines and penalties.
Of course, daughter Jamie will beg to differ. She blatantly makes mad fun of my driving, and it’s just about to the point where she will refuse to be a passenger in any vehicle if I’m behind the wheel. So unfair.
Just because I come to a halt when I feel threatened (tailgater, big truck, lost in Utica, etc.) is no reason to be cruel. Needless to say, I no longer drive when we’re together.
Talk about karma…I vividly remember totally losing control when teaching this kid about road safety. She was a horrible driver and I wasn’t shy about criticism and now, all these years later, I’ve been shamed into passenger status.
And I like it.
It’s almost to the point where I despise getting behind the wheel to go anywhere besides my immediate surrounding towns, with their happy little roads and very little traffic. I love it when someone else offers to drive me to the Big City, which I’m noticing happens more and more often.
Gee, maybe I really do stink at this, but I just don’t care. All I know is that the trip seems to go much faster when I’m not the operator.
So anyway, on a recent visit here Jamie and Alex needed to make a WallyWorld run so off we went. Mommy all cozy in the back seat with nary a care, harboring all the annoying power of back seat squatters. I took full advantage, of course, whining about the radio station, singing loudly and shouting inappropriate remarks.
Yet another example of the “full circle” theory when it comes to our children. We all know it’s gonna happen eventually, but it’s much more entertaining to actually see it transpire right before one’s eyes.
Are we there yet? How much longer? And finally, I have to pee!!! Parents everywhere have endured tons of that nonsense, and now, my turn—ME! I get to be a kid again, at their expense!
I enjoyed myself immensely, in fact maybe a wee bit too much. Next thing I know Alex was guiding me around the parking lot while on foot—claiming that clearly I have spacial issues in addition to thinking I’m way bigger than I am.
“Objects in mirror,” I told him. And so, a new cliche was coined as only family can do without anyone getting all insulted and pouty—Driving Miss Crazy.
It’s a keeper for sure and quite frankly, I’m okay with it. They have no idea how much worse it will no doubt get and should be mighty grateful that “I have to pee” is still part of my vocabulary, right?
Yes, I thought you’d agree!
